Academic Award Of Excellence: She Made It!

The Graduate and the Award of Excellence

Filipino family tradition dictates that the youngest male sibling will inherit the family home built by the parents. Our youngest just had it long before our parents left us.

My mother died suddenly while I was working abroad in 1996. I left home in 1990 after the devastating earthquake that hit Manila that year.  I mean, I left a couple of days after standing outside the Manila coliseum where the ground shook violently under my feet. I was a very angry human being at that time of my life running away from home.  That made my leaving easy.

I was separated from my family since then. When our youngest brother married, I wasn't there anymore so I have not known much about his wife. But they live with my parents as tradition adheres. Along the course of my overseas journey, wounds have healed so I made a few homecomings. One of those I had the chance to snap a photo of young Aireen (inset) with my Nikon camera.

My brother have two children all became the apple of my parent's eye. Especially the youngest, Aireen, who is just a complete reflection of my Grandmother on my father's side. She was tall, pretty and with white, lovely skin. I can tell by the way my mother and my father treated my niece that she was special.

I wasn't closed to my father. When my mother died, I just disappeared from his life completely. After my mother's burial in 1996, I continued my overseas journey without even knowing how my father dealt on my mother's passing as I was also struggling on my own grief. I just left and disengaged with my roots. Even when I took my flight to Canada in 1998, I never informed my father or any in my family. I hate telling people goodbyes. I prefered to just fade away on people's lives when I have some unpleasant feelings. But don't get me wrong, my father was a loving man.

It was a relative who told him I was already in Canada. At first, he couldn't communicate. I was not giving him my address. But maybe it was fate that our path will cross again. I think my roommate made me felt so guilty that I had to call him. My younger brother answered that call and I got connected again with the family.

My father was a WWII Veteran and became very active in his role as Veteran District Commander. He travelled a lot which he didn't do when my mother was still alive. He then asked for a personal transport so I help him bought a vehicle service so he can serve his comrades well. We started exchanging letters and told me of his many accomplishments. He proudly told me that he was head of the Veterans as Commander for 10 years because he was always undefeated every election. I wasn't surprised, he being the best teacher in his lifetime.

The news of his sudden 'stroke' forced me to take a plane for my first homecoming since becoming Canadian. Imagine the length of time I didn't see him? 12 long years....and when I came to the door, despite his health and memory lapses, he was shading tears at the sight of me. For the first time in our relationship as father and daughter, I hugged him a bit longer.

During his illness, he became bedridden. My younger brother and his family took care of him 24/7. From this moment on I stood with them. There were many tremendous ordeals my brother  and his family endured in rearing him. I made several homecomings during my father's remaining years. I made sure that he was given his best care and his needs provided through my younger brother.

When my father was finally dying, I made my last homecoming in 2011. My brother has been constantly updating me on his conditions so I felt I was on his side. I crossed the demarcation line one more time for him. I think I was ready to let him go rather than having him suffering longer. The money was tight but my roommate allowed me to grieve with the family and be on my father's side and send him to his final journey.

He was still lucid when I pick up his hands to kiss it. He opened his eyes and smiled at me. I think that was what he needed.....my presence. He knew I was strong and I think he felt that kind of peace and courage to face what was imminent.

I wasn't much concerned of my nephew because we all knew boys are stronger in dealing with pains. I was looking at young Aireen who was in high school sitting silently in one corner at my father's private room. The tears never left her since she was in the room looking blankly at her dying Grandpa. I felt her pain and I felt her agony. So I sat beside her and told her how she must face the impending moment that she'd lose the man she adored and who loved her unconditionally. She cried harder...I knew then that she was ready. My brother depended on me on the bigger things. It was also the time I made a pledged on my father's deathbed that I will not abandon them being the only sibling who needed guidance and support.

After my father's funeral and when I was back in Canada, I kept my promise; sending my nephew and my niece to college. Aireen took up Nursing when she finished high school. But then came the time that I can no longer afford her tuition so I shifted her on another course; teaching. Teaching...the very reason me and my father hated each other because he wanted me to become one and follow his footsteps. I can't be a teacher and he was upset about it big time. We both kept that certain disagreement within.

It may have been destiny that dictated my niece to switch to teaching. I knew this wasn't her ambition. She wanted to be a nurse but my niece is  obedient in nature. I was also sure her grandfather will be happy about it.

Sending someone to college was a little tough. My roommate mostly shouldered her needs to finish college. As we were watching her from afar, we trust that she will do her best to compensate our hard and difficult task of giving her education.

And my niece didn't fail us. She delivered. Just like when she graduated high school and she received so many medals hanging on her neck. This March 24th 2018 she will deliver the Valedictory address as she leads her class at her graduation ceremony for completing her Bachelor of Arts in Education mastering MAPEH (Music, Art, Physical Education and Health) receiving the top honor- Excellence Award.

A reward that I knew she will finally give us. We are honoured especially my roommate who lend her undying support for her success. Well, am sure my father and my mother are smiling up there. It's a dream we all have been working hard to achieve. And maybe my father can finally let go of our differences admitting I can't follow his footsteps. This one fine lady will...the one they loved so dearly in their lifetime.